The use of the two primary tools of witnessing and sharing, discussed in a previous article, is closely tied to one of our most precious commodities: a sense of humor. What is the quality we call a sense of humor and why is it so highly valued? Understanding the answer to that question will raise the level of desirability on those two fundamental tools and will hopefully make us want to cultivate them more completely. Remember that witnessing is observation or awareness plus equanimity or acceptance. Sharing is openness or willingness to connect plus honesty. In observing what we call a sense of humor, we see that humor requires perspective. To be able to laugh at a condition or a situation, one must have sufficient distance from it. If were too strongly identified to a thing, our emotional reaction to it will lack detachment, and we wont be able to laugh at it. Its only when we step away from identification with a thing and communicate either its inner workings or our own workings that humor arises. In other words, its only when we witness something, somebody, or ourselves, and share our observations that we are exhibiting a sense of humor. We see what is, we maintain adequate distance so as not to judge it, and we report our findings. Think of the episode of Seinfeld in which Jerry spends the entire show trying to remember his new girlfriends name. Its stressful to him because hes in the situation, but to us its hysterical. The quicker we can accomplish an attitude of detachment, the quicker we can find humor in the circumstances of our lives. Youve heard people say, Someday well look back at this and laugh. I say, Why wait? Total honesty + total acceptance = Humor Certainly, much humor seems to be laced with judgment, but if we look more deeply, well find that theres compassion and love behind the judgment. Perhaps the individual evoking the laugh is using judgment, but were laughing because of our delight with that persons way of sharing. In other words, were creating humor together. Theyre supplying the honesty and were supplying the acceptance. Both of these need to be present for humor to exist, and each of these is a component of the tools we use for making connections with others. Humor embraces rather than rejects lifes ironies, allowing us to celebrate our flawed humanity. Humor is one of the highest forms of communication, more capable than any other form of communication of eliciting states of delight and ecstasy, putting both the giver and receiver in touch with the divine within. Take the time to find the humor in your everyday life. Youll be elevating your consciousness and that of others. |
